From the first moments of my pregnancy, I dreamed of photographing myself united to my baby by the umbilical cord. This came forth in my attempt to give some balance to all the maternities in films, advertising and art history. These maternities re-enforce the stereotypes that impart from heterosexual masculine fantasies, in which exist the duality of the mother/whore, making sacred all that has to do with the “mother” (maternity with veil included).

The image of the woman that is re-enforced is not of the protagonist or hero but as someone with an illness, out of control, someone who needs assistance. Once again the woman is seen as an object, and objects do not bleed.

With these photos I wanted to show a maternity from my experience in which to give birth I open, I transform, I bleed, I scream and I smile. I smile because the pain gets me closer to my daughter, I smile because I am the protagonist, I smile because I am a hero.

Refuting the idea of fragility that is culturally learned, I wanted to show myself in control of my experience. I am standing, with the placenta still inside me. With my baby connected to me by the umbilical cord, and I do as I wish, I decide went to stop, take the photo and show myself. On a more historical level I am interested in lifting the veil. Show a maternity that is less virginal. A maternity seen from the archetypical primal woman, the woman beast that has NOTHING prohibited. Show a maternity not seen through the eyes of Eve (the divine punishment ”you will give birth with the pain of your body”) but seen through the eyes of Lucy (the first humanoid).

top Alquimia5a

ALCHEMY(From the hisp. ar. alkímya, this one from the class ar. k?miy?['],and this one from the gr. ??????, mixture of liquids).

1. f. Conjunction of speculations and experiencies, generally of an esoteric character, relative to the transmutation of matter, which influenced the origen of quemical science.It´s principal goal was the search for universal panacea.
2. f. Marvellous and incredible transmutation.

“The alchemist (…) gave the redentor suffering a larger dimension by associating matter to the human drama, all the while, until then, it had been an obstacle. The alchemist is freed with and by matter.”. Jacques van Lennep

“A disciple asked Socrates: Master, should I marry? And the great philosopher responded: Whatever you do you will regreat it.”

Brides offered, brides arranged, brides bought, brides genuinly in love, pass through the ritual of marriage with the hope of eternat love (universal panacea? ) The dress represents the illusion, the love, the beginning. It offeres the alchemic property of transormation. The normal becomes extraorinary. What happens to the illusions once the dress is put away? What happens when you become part od the “after”? What lies beHow to offer resistance to household mediocrity?

A poem is the alchemic element that brings back the magic of transformation to a bunch of forgotten dresses.

I buckle my wish

That I be at the right moment
at the right place,
that love comes back quickly,
that sex responds,
that forgiveness doesn´t arrive too late,
that living not be a utopia.

I desire to have desire,
that violence not exist
that I do not loose wonder
that I find what I am looking for.
That when I want to loose myself
nobody finds me.
That sometimes never is not always
and that always is not always.

BanySol Alvarez-Errecalde (1965-2007)

On a personal level I realized this exhibition basing myself on a poem written by one of my sisters that recently passed away, transmuted the apin of her absensence in union and complicity.

top tusche_akt_a3_4